Posted by: thebellalife | August 5, 2009

Corporate Talk

 

Discussions amongst the Plastics and I this week keeps veering towards our hatred for “corporate talk”.  You know, the expressions your boss utilizes to look easygoing, qualified and experienced.  Lingo like “Quick turnaround time”, “I’ll loop back with you”, “Do you have the bandwidth?”  and my PERSONAL favorite “Let’s talk Live”. 

The big question is – who created corporate “TALK”?  Where did it all begin?  Can we contribute it to some great corporate icon like Kenneth Lay?  

Unfortunately, cheesy corporate lingo doesn’t stop there.  Someone, probably decades ago, decided to take it a step further and create workplace ACRONYMS.   For example: KPI, ROI, CYA and Rev Gen (acronyms = Key Performance Indicators, Return on Investment, Cover Your A$& and Revenue Generation).

The list of acronyms around my office continues to grow at an alarming rate.  Each week, I sit in on a meeting where a new acronym is thrown at me.  Instead of admitting my ignorance, I quickly jot the new term down on my notepad, run back to my desk and GOOGLE IT.  Yes, I’m willing to admit, google has taught me almost everything I know.

However, I’d be a hypocrite if I walked away without saying, “I too have fallen victim”.  Just this last week I typed “by EOD” (translation= by End of Day) in at least 5 emails.  To make matters worse, I think I even threw in a “if you could loop back with me by EOD” into the mix once or twice.  I mean, how cheesy is that?

I guess, the moral of this story is, “if my boss jumped of a cliff…so would I”.

Corporate Cam

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Responses

  1. No, you wouldn’t… you are acclimatizing to the language you hear around you.

    As to who invented it? It wasn’t Lay, I’m sure, but there is no worse feeling that the first day at a company, writing down acronyms like crazy and not knowing what a single one stands for… “IDSFA” is my new one, thanks Cam 🙂

    Corporate mumble jumble sadly is not any different than text messaging mumble jumble or worse yet, being around a bunch of 15 yr olds!! Yo, what up home skillet? OMG! I was dressing n some biter did my daisy dukes, so I put my flares on – my threads are fly! Don’t step on my rides 2 – I’m so emo, not trying’ to be wanksta! Your BF4L…

    I know… ask your kid, or better yet, google it! 🙂

    Marta

  2. I feel ya . Then you get into online marketing and there’s a whole new slew of them – CPA, CPC, CTR, GA… I have to make a conscious effort to NOT use acronyms when talking with clients.

  3. Hi Mackenzie-

    I know…it is bad. Last week my friend and I were on an important call, and they asked us to refrain from using acronyms…I felt like such a dork.

    ~Camberley


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