Posted by: thebellalife | July 28, 2009

Corporate Cliques

 

 

Some believe cliques only exist in high school.  After being at “The-Large-Corporation-I-Work-For-That-Will-Not-Be-Named” for over a year now, I’m here to tell you this is not true.

For example, take the lunch room at my work.  In one corner of “The Cafe”, you have the mom squad.  This group is made up of 6-8 women, and on any given day, at least half of them are “with child”.

 

Mom Squad 
 

 

  
Then you have the weird middle aged married couple. This husband and wife duo sit across from each other everyday, holding hands above the table, and mulling over the daily newspaper.
 
 
 
 
Dynamic Duo 
 
 
 
Oddly Enough, the Dynamic Duo has some competition in the form of the “Interoffice Romance”.  “Interoffice Romance” is an unlikely pair (unlikely pair= overweight, 6′ 3″, gray haired, 60 year old white male + extremely petite, 5′ 0″, long haired, 40 year old Asian woman).  Unfortunately, I couldn’t find a good picture that resembles the unlikely pair.  In the meantime, the roles of our unlikely pair will be played by Gary Colman and his blushing bride.
 
 
Interoffice Romance = Unlikely Pair 
 

 

 
If you walk into the lunch room around 11:30 am, you will see the Barbie Brigade (AKA Sales).  Talk around the water cooler says the job description these women applied for listed the following as prerequisites: must be blond, with a minimum height of 5′ 5″, BMI <18.5, dress to the nines, well endowed…you get my point. 
 
 
Barbie Brigade 
 
 
 
By the time the crowd dies down (1:00 pm) IT rolls into the lunch room.  This group of (10-15) Indian American’s sits at a long buffet like table. Passing around bowls of rice and curry.  All the while speaking in their native tongue.
 
 
IT 
 
 
 
 

 

Last, but not least there is us……
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
the…..
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 PLASTICS
 
Plastics 
 
 
We are the “Large-Corporation-That-I-Work-For-That-Will-Not-Be-Named” ‘s young marketing rock stars.  Comprised of hip (we are all about market trends) Women and Ice Queens.   There are rules to being in our group. 
 
 
  1. Never go anywhere alone (after all, we must appear popular)
  2. Walk around throwing out terms like “target market”, “segmentation”, “social media” (This confirms that – Yes, we are important!) 
  3. Dress Code = Business Professional, Business Professional, Business Professional, Business Professional, Business Casual. Remember – printed T Shirts are not allowed! (Ice Queens turn their noses up to printed tees)
  4. Must be brutally honest with one another (i.e. we tell each other when it’s time to hit the tanning beds again – Vanity at it’s finest people)

 

 

I know most people hate cliques and all they stand for.  However, a wise man once said, “The worst cliques are those that consist of one man”

George Bernard Shaw

  

  

Good Night,

Camberley

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Responses

  1. I want to be a plastic… GET IN, We’re GOING SHOPPING!


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